Good Evening.

Years ago – years before I met the woman who was to become my wife, my soul-mate, my companion for life – I worked for a music company called IRS Records. We had an act there called THE ALARM, and they recorded a song called "Strength", that started with these words:

GIVE ME LOVE
GIVE ME HOPE
GIVE ME STRENGTH
GIVE ME SOMEONE TO LIVE FOR

Over the course of the past months, weeks, and finally days, as Fay fought so valiantly, those words have often come back to me, echoing a framework I could use to view my wife's life.

LOVE

Call her Fay, call her Fanoula – she came into this world in The Bronx, born of the love between Kyriacos and Barbara Vasilas. The family would eventually move to Queens, and Fay would go on to embrace her Greek roots, something she would do throughout her life. She became a founding member of the Maids Of Athena; she served as a District Governor for the Daughters of Penelope; eventually, she even tried to persuade her husband-to-be to share her love of spanakopita and avgolemono soup. She would be greatly successful in 2 out of 3 of those endeavors. Fay attended college at Hofstra; eventually finding employment first as a paralegal; later in the contracts department of publishing giant Simon & Shuster.

HOPE

When Fay's father suffered a debilitating stroke, she clung to the hope that a cure, or at least some improvement, was just around the corner. And when it wasn't, and he needed help, she was often the one to provide it. She had tremendous hope that a family, and a child, would be in her future. The first hope was answered when I was lucky enough to score an invite to a party that my older brother's sister-in-law was having to raise funds for her campaign for a seat on New York's judicial bench. It didn't take long for 'like' to turn to 'love'; or for 'I just might' to turn into 'I do'.

A few years later, Fay's greatest hope – and mine – became her greatest joy, her greatest accomplishment, when the most beautifulest daughter EVER, Barbra Miriam Lyons, entered the world. And no, I am NOT prejudiced. Whether reading a story, singing a song, playing a game, Barbra was Fay's greatest hope, her fondest wish, come to life. Anything that anyone could ever hope for on this earth, was made real by the presence of Barbra in her life.

STRENGTH

11 years later, something else came into our lives. That something else was named cancer. From the moment it arrived, life would never be the same. We learned a lot from cancer. We learned that Strength is a compound made by combining Love and Hope. We learned that you don't have to be religious to offer the most fervent of prayers. We learned that battles are rarely won alone. And of course we learned – as so many have before us – that it's not the size of the woman in the fight; it's the size of the fight in the woman.

SOMEONE TO LIVE FOR

My Fay, my beautiful, wonderful, loving Fay fought not one but 2 kinds of cancer over the past 5 and half years – first breast cancer, then leukemia. She fought them ferociously, she fought until her gas tank hit empty, and then she fought a little bit more. She fought them with a dignity and grace that leaves me humbled and in awe. She left this place in the early hours of last Thursday, but her presence is with us, with me, still. A couple of days ago, someone said to me that Fay had a rare gift – the gift of being able to make whoever she was with, at any given moment, feel like they were the most important friend she had at that particular moment. Like they were someone for her to live for. What a wonderful legacy to leave behind. And now I have someone to live for, a task that we started together. Her name is Barbra. And though Fay's presence may be just a bit less visible, for both of us, she will remain someone to live for.

Trisagion service will be Wednesday, November 15, 2017 at 7.30pm, held at Saint Sophia Greek Orthodox Cathedral, 1324 Normandie Avenue, Los Angeles, CA. Funeral and interment will be held at a later date in Flushing, New York. Contributions may be given to Saint Sophia Philoptochos Society.

Arrangements under the direction of Chapman Funeral Homes - Terry & Mary Harmon, Funeral Directors. Toll free (855) 628-0447.

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Obituary notice for Chapman Funeral Homes. Please visit www.chapmanfuneraldirectors.com .

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